"how did High education people avoid seeking mental help"
On October 6, 2025, a tragedy occurred in Singapore. A family of three, originally from Northeast China, had immigrated to Singapore years ago and lived in a public housing flat. Both parents were highly educated, and their daughter, a former top student at a prestigious Singaporean school and holder of a Cambridge PhD, later suffered a mental breakdown and became unable to care for herself.
When this family moved to Singapore, they were full of hope for the future.
The parents, being highly educated, valued education, and their daughter displayed exceptional learning talent from a young age, rarely causing them any worry about her studies. While studying at a prestigious Singaporean school, she consistently ranked at the top of her class, with teachers and classmates praising her, saying, "This child will definitely have a bright future."
Later, she successfully gained admission to the Computer Science Department of the National University of Singapore, completing her undergraduate and master's degrees, and then pursuing her PhD at the University of Cambridge in the UK. When she received her PhD in 2008, her parents held a small gathering to share their pride with relatives and friends.
At that time, she was the "perfect child" in the eyes of her relatives and friends, the pride of her parents, and a role model in the immigrant community for "changing one's destiny through knowledge." But no one knew that behind this "perfection" lay hidden dangers.
The parents later recalled that during their daughter's doctoral studies, she often stayed up all night working on her dissertation and conducting experiments, experiencing so much pressure that she couldn't sleep for nights on end and sometimes would inexplicably become irritable. At the time, everyone thought "highly educated people have to endure hardship" and didn't pay much attention, simply telling her, "Just hang in there."
Unexpectedly, this perseverance didn't yield good results. After graduating with her doctorate, their daughter's mental state deteriorated. At first, she was just quiet, but later her behavior became increasingly abnormal—she would stare blankly at the wall at home, and suddenly stop and clap her hands on the street when she went out.
Neighbors encountered her in the elevator and even saw her singing to thin air, her expression stiff, her eyes vacant, a stark contrast to the confident and cheerful academic star she once was. Her parents panicked and took her to see a doctor, where she was diagnosed with a mental illness.
However, the treatment was not effective; their daughter's condition fluctuated, and eventually, she needed her parents' help even with basic daily tasks like dressing and cooking.
In 2017, the mother passed away due to illness, leaving the entire burden of the family on the father's shoulders. The over-70-year-old not only had to care for his mentally unstable daughter but also handle all the household chores, pushing him to the brink of physical and mental exhaustion.
Neighbors said they rarely saw them go out during that period. Occasionally, they saw the father go to the supermarket, but he would rush home after buying his groceries, his back much more hunched, his eyes filled with weariness. Sometimes, when neighbors tried to talk to him, he would only nod, his steps unwavering, as if avoiding something.
Starting in September of this year, Ms. Zeng, who lived downstairs, noticed something was wrong. A thick, red liquid began seeping from her ceiling, and a pungent, rotten odor permeated the apartment, causing dizziness and nausea.
She initially thought it was a leaking pipe and had the property management check it several times, but found nothing. Later, the stench grew stronger, and strange marks were left where she had cleaned. Unable to bear it any longer, Ms. Zeng asked her son to contact the property management, hoping to pry open the upstairs door to investigate.
On the afternoon of October 6th, property management staff and Mr. Zeng finally pried open the long-closed door.
As soon as the door opened, a stench of decay hit them, and the scene before them froze everyone in place: their 47-year-old daughter was curled up in the entryway, dressed in old pajamas, already lifeless.
In the bedroom, their 70-year-old father lay on the bed, his body severely decomposed due to prolonged neglect, his bones clearly visible.
On the table lay unfinished instant noodles, long since spoiled and blackened. The room was a mess, as if ransacked, exuding an atmosphere of despair.
The forensic examination determined that the father had died first, and about a month later, the daughter, unable to care for herself, starved to death without anyone to look after her.
This result, when circulated online, prompted netizens to sigh, "How could such a highly educated family end up like this?" and "If only such a brilliant PhD had received help sooner, would things be different?"
Here's a crucial point to clarify: Why do highly educated families also fall into such predicaments? Many people believe that "highly educated = capable of solving problems," but in reality, highly educated individuals can also be helpless when facing mental health and daily care issues.
On the one hand, they may be reluctant to disclose their family's difficulties to outsiders due to "saving face," missing opportunities to seek help; on the other hand, the treatment of mental illness requires long-term companionship and professional support, which is difficult for family members to cope with alone.
Especially after the mother's death, the father, caring for his sick daughter alone, lacks experience and external help, making him easily overwhelmed by the pressure.
More importantly, we often overemphasize the academic achievements of "top students," neglecting their psychological resilience and life skills. Like this Cambridge PhD, who grew up in a high-pressure academic environment and lacked life skills training, once mental health issues arise, he is easily trapped in a predicament of "inability to care for himself."
While the parents, being highly educated, might excel at academic guidance, they lacked the expertise to handle their child's emotional crisis, ultimately watching helplessly as the situation worsened.
This immigrant family from Northeast China, hoping for a better life in Singapore, tragically ended their lives in this way. Their tragedy serves as a mirror, reflecting the vulnerability beneath the aura of high education, and reminding us that regardless of education level or location, seeking help promptly when facing difficulties and paying close attention to the mental well-being of those around us are crucial to preventing such tragedies.
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